Today is the first day of my period and day 1 of a new menstrual cycle – yay! I love the menstrual phase or “inner winter”, not only because it brings a relief of the tension of the pre-menstrual phase but because it is the time of the month when I honour myself with rest and self-care. The last couple of cycles have been pretty messed up for me with all of the craziness going on in the world. Being stuck in lockdown working super hard then quitting my job and moving abroad then going into lockdown again here in Greece.. it’s been pretty stressful to say the least and it showed in my cycles. I had 3 cycles which were 35-37 days long, intense period pains and stagnant blood (this shows up as brown colour with the texture of dirt). So I’m happy that this month things seem to be back to normal with a 30 day cycle and a healthy red flow.
This is one thing I love about menstrual cycle awareness practice. When something isn’t quite right in our lifestyle, often our menstrual cycles are the first place it shows and if we’re not paying attention we can totally miss it. Tracking your cycle length, flow quality and any symptoms showing up throughout the month is a great way to get to know your cycle and tune into the state of your health. Intense pain, excessive PMS symptoms or irregular cycles can all be a sign that something isn’t quite right internally or in your environment. If you notice something strange or unusual, that is a red flag and a hint for you to get quiet for a moment and ask yourself what is going on.
Stress alone can be enough to throw a spanner in the works when it comes to our cycles. This doesn’t have to be a traumatic event but it can be the build up of small stresses due to living in the fast-paced high pressure society that we do. If we don’t have an outlet or a way to manage these stresses, this can lead to chronic tension in the mind and body which affects our overall health, including our hormones. In this post I explain how you can reduce stress and balance your hormones using minimalism, journalling and meditation. Using these techniques, or anything else that helps you to unwind and relax are important all throughout your cycle but even more so during your period. Yin yoga sequences are perfect and I am planning to share more here soon so watch out for that if you’re interested!
Today I was lucky to have the space for a slow morning. I made one of my favourite menstrual phase breakfast recipes, banana oat pancakes and swapped out my morning coffee for a warming chai herbal tea. I’ve been trying to get into the habit of dry body brushing for the last month after reading about the benefits but I’m not always good at remembering to do it. This morning though I decided to pamper myself a bit and took the time to dry body brush, have a long relaxing shower and moisturise from head to toe. I even straightened my hair and put on a bit of make up even though I have no intention of going anywhere today! This afternoon I was teaching a yoga class so I had to prepare for that and do a bit of house work but I did my best to move at my bodies’ pace and take it easy. I made the class a really relaxing and grounding hatha flow and I put on some calming music while I worked.
Now I am feeling peaceful and comfortable in my body – a welcome change from the agony of the last couple of months! I was feeling inspired to share a bit about my experience of the menstrual phase and a few of my tips for looking after yourself during this time. I’m aware everyone’s experience is different when it comes to periods and that conditions such as endometriosis and PCOS can make menstruation a difficult time. However, I’m sure that taking as much time as you have available, whether that’s ten minutes or three hours, will help you to make your period as comfortable as possible. A few months of practicing this and you never know, you might even start to love this phase too.
My top 5 tips for self-care during your period
Wipe 3 things off your to do list – delegate them to a day in the cycle when you have more energy
2. Slow down – even if you have tasks you can’t avoid, try to do them at your bodies’ pace
3. Pamper yourself – whether that’s a luxurious shower (try to avoid hot baths while you are bleeding) or wearing your favourite body lotion, do something to nourish your body
4. Nourish your body – make yourself some nutrient dense, yummy foods. See here for my tips on nutrition for the menstrual phase
5. Rest – take a break from intense exercise and focus instead on light stretching, walking or yin yoga. Your body will thank you for it!
Over to you…
I hope you enjoyed this short post on stress and self-care during the menstrual phase. Please like this post and follow my blog for more on healthy hormones and holistic health.
Let me know in the comments below if you try out any of these tips or any other self-care you practice to feel better during your period
If you are looking for support and guidance in balancing your hormones and looking and feeling great, contact me for further information on the health coaching packages I offer. Together we will set you up with a plan to get your hormones balanced and you feeing your best mentally and physically.
Today is the first day of my period and day 1 of a new menstrual cycle. I love the menstrual phase or “inner winter” because it brings a relief of the tension of the pre-menstrual phase. Also because it is the time of the month when I honour myself with rest and self-care. In this post I want to share my tips for nurturing self care for your period.
The last couple of cycles have been pretty messed up for me with all of the craziness going on in the world. Being stuck in lockdown working super hard then quitting my job and moving abroad then going into lockdown again here in Greece.. it’s been pretty stressful to say the least and it showed in my cycles. I had 3 cycles which were 35-37 days long, intense period pains and stagnant blood (this shows up as brown colour with the texture of dirt). So I’m happy that this month things seem to be back to normal with a 30 day cycle and a healthy red flow.
Where to start with self care for your period
This is one thing I love about menstrual cycle awareness practice. When something isn’t quite right in our lifestyle, often our menstrual cycles are the first place it shows. If we’re not paying attention we can totally miss it. Tracking your cycle length, flow quality and any symptoms showing up throughout the month is a great way to get to know your cycle and tune into the state of your health.
Intense pain, excessive PMS symptoms or irregular cycles can all be a sign that something isn’t quite right internally or in your environment. If you notice something strange or unusual, that is a red flag and a hint for you to get quiet for a moment and ask yourself what is going on. Practicing self care for your period can help you to feel better throughout the month.
Stress alone can be enough to throw a spanner in the works when it comes to our cycles. This doesn’t have to be a traumatic event but it can be the build up of small stresses due to living in the fast-paced high pressure society that we do. If we don’t have an outlet or a way to manage these stresses, this can lead to chronic tension in the mind and body which affects our overall health, including our hormones.
Ideas for self care for your period
In this post I explain how you can reduce stress and balance your hormones using minimalism, journalling and meditation. Using these techniques, or anything else that helps you to unwind and relax are important all throughout your cycle but even more so during your period. Self care for your period is one of the best things you can do for your overall health as a woman. Yin yoga sequences are perfect and I am planning to share more here soon so watch out for that if you’re interested!
Today I was lucky to have the space for a slow morning. I made one of my favourite menstrual phase breakfast recipes, banana oat pancakes and swapped out my morning coffee for a warming chai herbal tea. I’ve been trying to get into the habit of dry body brushing for the last month after reading about the benefits but I’m not always good at remembering to do it. This morning though I decided to pamper myself a bit and took the time to dry body brush, have a long relaxing shower and moisturise from head to toe.
I even straightened my hair and put on a bit of make up even though I have no intention of going anywhere today! This afternoon I was teaching a yoga class so I had to prepare for that and do a bit of house work but I did my best to move at my bodies’ pace and take it easy. I made the class a really relaxing and grounding hatha flow and I put on some calming music while I worked.
Now I am feeling peaceful and comfortable in my body – a welcome change from the agony of the last couple of months! I was feeling inspired to share a bit about my experience of the menstrual phase and a few of my tips for looking after yourself during this time. I’m aware everyone’s experience is different when it comes to periods and that conditions such as endometriosis and PCOS can make menstruation a difficult time.
However, I’m sure that taking as much time as you have available, whether that’s ten minutes or three hours, will help you to make your period as comfortable as possible. A few months of practicing this and you never know, you might even start to love this phase too.
Top 5 self care tips
Here are five simple ideas of self care for your period. Try a couple next time you menstruate and notice a difference in how you feel in your body, mind and spirit!
Wipe 3 things off your to do list – delegate them to a day in the cycle when you have more energy
2. Slow down – even if you have tasks you can’t avoid, try to do them at your bodies’ pace
3. Pamper yourself – whether that’s a luxurious shower (try to avoid hot baths while you are bleeding) or wearing your favourite body lotion, do something to nourish your body
5. Rest – take a break from intense exercise and focus instead on light stretching, walking or yin yoga. Your body will thank you for it!
Over to you…
If you would like to work with me to balance your hormones and improve your health, contact me to set up a free 15 minute discovery call. I am a nutritionist, yoga teacher and women’s wellness coach. We work together using a combination of modalities to support your individual needs and help you to feel your best.
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If you have read my posts in the period recovery series on Why has my period stopped and how do I get it back? and What is Hypothalamic Amenorrhea? you will know that chronic or restrictive dieting is one of the major reasons for missing periods. So what is the perfect Hypothalamic Amenorrhea recovery diet? What should you eat to get your period back of it has gone awry? In those posts I stated that “good food and lots of it” is the way to go. In this article I want to give a few more tips on exactly how to eat to get your period back.
Just a quick note before we start, I am a qualified nutritionist, yoga teacher and Women’s Wellness Coach and my specialty is helping women to balance their hormones and heal their body and metabolism after chronic or restrictive dieting (see My Certifications page for further details). The information shared here is a combination of my nutrition and health education, my personal experience with getting my period back after 8 years of Hypothalamic Amenorrhea and the expert advice of Dr Nicola Rinaldi, author of No Period Now What. If you are looking for guidance, support and accountability on your HA recovery journey, please contact me or check out the holistic health coaching packages I offer.
Now, on with the article!
How much should I eat to recover my period?
It is recommended to eat 2500 calories or more to recover from Hypothalamic Amenorrhea. Yes, even for those who aren’t exercising (and I don’t recommend that you do exercise if you are trying to recover your period). Your body needs to be in an energy surplus right now which means taking in more energy than you are burning through being alive and any activities you do. If you have been dieting for a long time, your body will have a whole list of things it wants to repair, not just your hormones, and this energy will go towards building healthy bones, teeth, hair and nails just to name a few!
I will stress though that this is a minimum and if you are hungry for more than this then you should listen to your body and eat. When I first started recovery I spent a good few months eating at least 3000-4000 calories a day because that was what my body needed. Sometimes way more than that. Did I gain weight? Yes! But again, that was what what my body needed. Over time my appetite settled down but even now I rarely eat below 2000 calories and I have maintained a healthy period for nearly 5 years. I don’t recommend counting calories long term but it can be a good idea in the beginning to get an idea of how much you need to eat. Especially if you have been under-eating for a long time, you will need to recalibrate your idea of a normal meal.
What should I eat to fix my period? What is the perfect HA recovery diet?
Especially in the beginning, it doesn’t matter too much where these calories are coming from, it is the energy that is most important. As a nutritionist of course I am all about eating well and getting plenty of micro-nutrients into your diet but this is something that should be done over the long term and what you do for a few months of recovery is less important. You can choose to re-feed with only “healthy foods” or you can choose to add in more “fun foods”. My recommendation is to get plenty of nutritious food into your body but don’t obsess over having a perfectly healthy diet. Make sure you eat foods that taste good and bring you pleasure. I mean, if you are going to eat lots of food and gain weight you might as well let go and enjoy it!
(edit – see my more recent post on the best foods to eat to raise your metabolism and heal your hormones!)
Will eating more fats bring my period back? What about carbs? What is the best macro ratio for HA recovery?
The first question women often ask is do I need to eat more fats to get my period back. The answer here is maybe! Check what you are eating right now. Are you following a low-fat diet? Our bodies need fats to function optimally and produce hormones so eating more fats could be exactly what you need. On the other hand, if you are following a high-fat low-carb paleo or keto style diet, adding more carbs may be the answer. Eating carbs produces an insulin response which helps our bodies feel safe that there is plenty of food around and come out of energy-saving mode.
I fully agree that these diets can be beneficial for overcoming certain diseases and provide benefits for otherwise healthy people, but if you have lost your period, this is a major sign that you are not a healthy person right now and something needs to change. So no, there is no specific diet or macro-nutrient ratio to follow, just make sure you are getting plenty of carbs, proteins and fats and listen to your cravings. Trust that your body knows exactly what it needs and don’t be afraid to go with the flow.
What about liquids? How much water should I drink?
On that note, I want to talk about water consumption. Many of us fell for the myth that you need to drink lots of water to be healthy. We also listened to the same people who told us to eat less salt to be healthy. For many of us with a perfectionist, all or nothing mindset we took this too far and drank several litres of water per day and ate hardly any salt. This is a recipe for disaster! We need salt to maintain a healthy water balance in our body and drinking too much water can flush out electrolytes leaving us feeling cold, dizzy and “washed out”.
If you have been doing this, I recommend experimenting with reducing the amount of water you are drinking and increasing your salt consumption. This is something I only learned way after my period recovery journey but it has been extremely beneficial for my overall health. I learned this from reading book Eat for Heat, a book written by Matt Stone, an expert on raising metabolism. He describes a symptom of restrictive dieting that I experienced myself – needing to pee all of the time as well as a low body temperature.
Especially at the beginning of recovery, or if you are feeling very cold, replace all zero calorie drinks including water and diet soda with things like milk, juice, smoothies or even sports drinks containing electrolytes and glucose. Your body actually needs the salts and sugar to properly absorb the water which explains why plain water often feels like it “goes straight through you”. You can even add a pinch of salt to every glass if you are really struggling wit hydration. If you notice yourself peeing less frequently, feeling warmer, especially your fingers and toes, and sleeping better then you know you are on the right track to recovery.
Does it matter when I eat during recovery? Can I get my period back whilst intermittent fasting?
There is also is the question of when to eat? Again, there is no strict rule on this but consistency is key. You can eat 3 square meals or you can graze throughout the day. As long as you are getting in plenty of calories it doesn’t matter how you do it. What I will say is not to let yourself get too hungry as low blood sugar is perceived as a stress by the body. If you are getting cranky, anxious or panicky before your next meal you have probably left it too long and should think about adding an extra snack before you get to that point. Often 3 meals with 3 snacks is recommended as a good eating structure and if you have no clue then this can be a good place to start.
One thing I don’t recommend is intermittent fasting. Again, there is some research showing fasting to have lots of health benefits but it is really not a good idea in recovery. If you want to practice intermittent fasting I would suggest to do no more than 12 hours fasting e.g. 7am to 7pm eating window. This gives your digestive system a break to heal and repair but doesn’t leave you going for long periods during the day without food. Personally I got really hungry at night during my recovery and sometimes I would wake up during the night starving and need to eat. It really depends on where you are coming from, how long and how intensely you have been dieting. So, do what you need to and don’t set any rules as really anything goes.
Can I recover my period on a vegan or vegetarian diet? What about gluten-free?
Another question women ask is if it is possible to recover on specific diets such as vegan or vegetarian, gluten-free. The answer to this is yes it is possible! However, I would recommend to examine why you are following this diet and if it is a way for you to continue to restrict then maybe it is time to reconsider. I personally recovered my period on a vegan diet but later decided to incorporate animal products back into my diet when I realised that this was still a way for me to control my food intake and keep my eating disorder alive. If you are following a particular diet for ethical reasons or due to a health condition then this is fine, just make sure you are allowing yourself to eat plenty of food, not restricting any macro-nutrients and find suitable alternatives for foods that are off-limits so that you don’t feel deprived mentally.
What if my diet is limited by digestive issues? Can I still get my period back on a restricted diet?
If the reason you are avoiding certain foods is due to digestive issues, it is for you to decide whether you want to add them back into your recovery diet. If you have allergies or intolerances then by all means stay clear of foods you are sensitive to. However I will say that many people on restrictive diets find that they develop food sensitivities over time and end up eliminating more and more foods from their diet. This is a sign of your digestive system shutting down and is a signal to increase the quantity and variety of foods in your diet not to continue to restrict further. I know that for me personally after following a high fruit vegan diet for over a year, I initially struggled with stomach pain, bloating and gas when adding grains and legumes back into my diet.
Unfortunately it takes time for our stomach acid, digestive enzymes and gut microbiome to re-establish after a period of “starvation” and it can take a while to settle out. Again, this is where eating processed foods comes in handy as they are much easier on our digestive systems. Things like crackers or rice cakes with nut butter, jam, molasses or hummus spread on top were so helpful in the early days of my recovery. I also ate a lot of cookies (dark chocolate hobnobs mmmm!), cereals and sandwiches and found they digested really well. Later on I drifted back towards a more whole foods diet but still ate plenty of these foods on a daily basis. The best thing is to listen to your cravings and experiment freely.
Do I have to eat processed food to get my period back?
What I will say is that processed foods are your friend and there is no need to be afraid of them. Foods such as bread, crackers, pasta, nut butters, milk, cereals and jams are easy to digest in large quantities and will help you to get the calories you need into your body without over-stressing your digestive system. Basically you want to increase the energy density of the food you are eating i.e. more calories per volume. The reason that a whole foods diet is so successful for weight loss is because your body can feel full on fewer calories due to the higher amounts of fibre and water in foods such as fruits and vegetables. This is great for people who need to lose weight and overcome conditions such as diabetes and heart disease but you are not one of those people. You need to give your body the energy it needs to repair and feel safe again and in this case processed foods are extremely helpful.
Something that helped me with adding “fear foods” back into my diet was realising that a healthy system is a robust one that can digest and thrive on a wide range of foods, not one that can only function on a very specific, limited list of foods. The aim of the recovery process is to rebuild a healthy metabolism so that your body can function optimally again. A person with a healthy metabolism can consume a lot of food and has energy to live an active fulfilling life. Visualise what you want from your recovery journey and focus on that every day to help you get through difficult choices ♥️
Over to you…
I hope you found this helpful and feel confident in how to eat to get your period back. Let me know in the comments, what is the most difficult part of the “recovery diet” for you? And what is your favourite food that you added back in since starting recovery? Please like and share this post to support my business and follow my blog for more useful posts on nutrition, yoga and holistic health!
If you are looking for guidance, support and accountability on you health journey, please contact me or check out the nutrition and holistic health coaching packages I offer. My specialty is helping women to balance their hormones and heal their body and metabolism after chronic or restrictive dieting but I also help anyone who is looking to improve their overall health and find the perfect balance for their body. I would love to work together with you to move past any health blocks and get you feeling your best again!
In this post I want to give a short summary of the phases of your menstrual cycle. As I shared in my previous post, why understanding the menstrual stages is important, this is useful information not only for women who are preparing for pregnancy but for any woman who wants to feel more connected to her female body and learn how to take care of herself during these monthly shifts.
Phases of the menstrual cycle
There are four phases of your hormonal cycle:
Follicular phase
The follicular phase is the time after you finish your period when Follicular Stimulating Hormone (FSH) causes egg follicles to start maturing in your ovaries ready for the next cycle. Estrogen also increases gradually during this phase to build up the lining of your womb.
Ovulatory phase
During the ovulatory phase, a surge in Liutenising Hormone (LH) causes a mature egg to be released from one of your ovaries and start to make it’s way towards your womb. You are the most fertile at this point and peaks in estrogen and testosterone lead to changes in your body to increase the chance of conception.
Luteal phase
Also known as the pre-menstrual phase or simply the pre-menstruum, the luteal phase is the period of time after ovulation when the body prepares for a potential pregnancy. Progesterone is released to maintain the lining of your womb and prepare it to accept a fertilised egg.
Menstrual phase
If you don’t get pregnant, your production of progesterone rapidly declines leading to the shedding of the womb lining, aka your monthly bleed. This can be accompanied by cramping as the muscles of your womb contract to help the shedding process. On average women lose 6-8 teaspoons of blood during each menstrual period!
Changes in your body in the phases of the menstrual cycle
The changing hormones in each phase lead to a different state of your physical, emotional and mental bodies. Once we start to live with mindful awareness of our cycles, we start to pick up on these subtle changes and become conscious of when we are shifting from one phase to the next. The amount of time spent in each phase and the experience you have will depend on your genetics and lifestyle factors such as diet, exercise, sleep and stress levels. No two women are the same but I will give an example of a menstrual cycle below including how each phase might feel when your hormones are in balance or when there is an imbalance present.
PHASE
LENGTH
WHEN IN BALANCE
WHEN OUT OF BALANCE
Follicular
7-10
Rising energy, more extroverted, creative, open minded
Fatigue, anxiety
Ovulatory
3-4
High energy, extroverted, social, confident, high libido
Stress, anxiety, overwhelm, low libido, pain
Luteal
10-14
Decreasing energy, introverted, more critical, increased sensitivity
This is just example to help you start to become aware of the shifts that can occur throughout a monthly menstrual cycle and some signs of imbalance to watch out for. However, I can’t stress enough the importance of tracking your own cycle to see what your own patterns are. See my post here for how to start tracking your menstrual cycle and how you can use this information to sync your lifestyle with your cycle.
Menstrual cycle and the lunar phases
Ancient legends describe how women’s monthly cycles once were in sync with the cycles of the moon. Perhaps, it’s no coincidence that our menstrual cycles are approximately the same length as a lunar cycle? Just like the tides are governed by the gravitational pull of the moon, it is possible that the tides of our womb are also affected by these forces. It is believed that historically, most women would be at their most fertile during the bright full moon days and would bleed during the dark moon or new moon which was seen as a time of deeper intuition and spiritual connection. A beautiful book which captures this image is The Red Tent by Anita Diamant.
Of course, these days we are mostly living in cities with artificial lights, completely out of touch with nature and the cycles of the moon. Research shows no connection between women’s cycles and the moon cycles in the present day. However, I still think it is a beautiful metaphor for our monthly shifts from bright and bold to more reserved and mystical. I like to believe there is some truth in this connection between our feminine rhythms and the lunar cycles. For me personally, once I started to pay attention to the moon phases and consciously see the moon at least a moon times a week, my cycle did start to sync with it’s phases and has done for the last 12 months. I hope that more research is done in this areas as it truly is fascinating and this was the inspiration for my business name Moon Life!
Over to you…
Let me know in the comments below how you feel about your menstrual cycle, do you feel connected to it or is it something that you wish you could forget? Like and share this post to support my business and follow my blog for more on menstrual cycle awareness, yoga and holistic health.
If you are interested in learning how to connect with your cycle, you can enroll in my health coaching program Prepare for Pregnancy where I will teach you how to nourish your body using nutrition, intuitive movement, stress management and menstrual cycle awareness. I would love to work with you to help you connect with your feminine rhythms and restore your natural health and vitality.
Right now I am in my pre-menstrual phase and I have been struggling a lot with difficult emotions. I am feeling unsettled, sad, angry, lost and confused. Luckily because I track my cycle I know that this is the time of the month when things like this are most likely come up. As women we are so good at hiding how we really feel and getting on with things, often trying to keep others happy at the expense of our own wellbeing. This ability to override our darkest emotions is much stronger in the first half of our cycle when estrogen is high. And it’s not like its a conscious decision, our bodies do this automatically so we can actually experience it as feeling fine one week and then crazy the next.
So what should we do when these feelings come up shake our sense of self? It can be tempting to squash the feelings down through distraction or coping mechanisms such as emotional eating or to dismiss them as PMS or just “being hormonal”. But if we take the time to listen we can really learn something about how we feel about our lives and use it to make positive changes. Something I have been trying to do is to sit in the stew of emotions, just letting myself feel whatever comes up without judging or trying to change things. If I am feeling depressed one day letting that be and not using any of the “make yourself happy” techniques like fake positive affirmations which never really worked for me anyway. Every emotion is valid and is just a signal from your body trying to tell you something.
Another GREAT thing to do is just allow yourself to lose it. Some women, myself included, tend to be pretty controlled with their emotions on a daily basis. At work, many of us are in male-dominated environment and we don’t want to come across as weak or over-emotional. At home, we don’t want to offend or upset our partners or families with our anger or sadness. But actually letting go of control and just letting it all out is exactly what we need. Its better to do it consciously rather than being hit by an emotional outburst out of the blue. Scream, shout, cry, punch a pillow, dance like crazy.. anything to get that energy moving up and out of your body. Maybe you feel embarrassed and don’t want to look stupid? Some of my favourites are screaming as loud as I can whilst driving on the motorway, letting myself lie down and cry even if I don’t know exactly why I am crying and putting on music and just shaking my body.
If you aren’t comfortable with any of these try writing it out in a journal or making a video-diary but honestly I think the physical aspect is super important. When put our emotions to one side, they don’t go away but stay in our bodies as tension and stress. Eventually we have to release them otherwise we will manifest sickness and disease. Many conditions that are common today are influenced by chronic stress as a factor including diabetes, fatigue and auto-immune conditions (which affect women much more than men!). Our cycle provides us with the pre-menstrual phase as the perfect time to have this energy release so that we can go into the deep resting and healing menstrual phase with a clean slate.
So try it out if you’re interested. If you are tracking your cycle then from day 21-28 (or around a week before your period is due to start if your cycle is less/more than 28 days) create some free time in your schedule to just do nothing and see what comes up emotionally. If this is the first time you are doing this don’t be surprised to feel some pretty intense emotions. Sometimes tension can be stored deep in the body for a long time and it can be overwhelming to have a wave of old emotions hit you. But trust that if you practice this monthly ritual of processing and releasing what has come up that cycle then it will become much easier over time and will become something to look forward to as you shed what is no longer serving you and create space for new energy to come in.
If I ask women which part of their cycle they like the least I can almost guarantee it will either be the menstrual or pre-menstrual phases. For some, extreme pain and heavy bleeding can make menses a horrible time of the month. For others, suffering from mood swings, fatigue, headaches and a whole range of other PMS symptoms in the run up to our period means that by the time we finally start bleeding it is a relief. If either of both of these situations are familiar to you, I hope I can offer a different perspective which might help you to embrace your cycle and perhaps ease some of your pain.
In order to understand what is happening during these stages, we need to consider the menstrual cycle as a whole. I did write about getting to know the different phases of the cycle through menstrual cycle awareness here for those who are interested. The key part here is realising that the cycle can be separated into two: the first part beginning after your period until a few days after ovulation (we’ll call this the expansion phase) and the second part from here until you finish bleeding (this is the contraction phase). You can imagine your cycle like a tide, moving upwards and reaching high tide at ovulation and then slowly retreating until low tide during your bleeding days.
A similar tide is happening internally. During our period we tend to feel more introverted with lower energy to go out and do things. We feel like hibernating at home with comfy blankets and food and often can find people annoying and demanding. Afterwards, our energy starts to rise along with our oestrogen levels and our curiosity about the world outside increases. We start to get more motivation to go out into the world, start new projects, be active etc. and the feeling keeps rising for the next couple of weeks until ovulation when we tend to feel our most outgoing and confident. For obvious reasons this is usually the more preferred part of our cycle. Especially in the crazy modern world where we constantly having things to do and people to see, this ongoing energy is what we crave.
However, if we continue with the “doing all of the things” energy we would eventually burn out. So thankfully our bodies have a built in mechanism to slow us down and force us to retreat inwards and recharge our batteries. After ovulation when oestrogen levels peak, they fall off a cliff and progesterone takes over. This is the luteal phase which lasts until we start bleeding. If we accept this as a time of relaxation and surrender, it can actually be very enjoyable. It is only when we feel that things should be different than they are that we start to feel resentful. Now, I understand that we still have things to do during this time. Unfortunately work, families and other demands don’t just stop because of changes in our hormones but we can learn to work with the changes rather than continuing to force the outgoing energy and burning out.
This could look like changing our work schedule if possible to avoid any big meetings or presentations during the second half of our cycle (and we will be much more engaging and confident if we can arrange these around ovulation so win-win). Also switching up our workout routine to include more gentle exercise such as walking, yoga or short resistance training sessions rather than high-intensity cardio circuits. It might seem counter-productive if we have fitness goals to achieve but actually working with our bodies we will see much better results. At home we can try to make things easier by doing as much of the intense cleaning and admin we need to do during the first half of our cycle so that we can allow ourselves more space to relax in the second half. Finally, not pushing ourselves to go out and socialise when we really want to stay in and read a book. This can be a difficult one too as we aren’t in control of other people’s calendars and there will be events that we don’t want to miss but the best thing to do is listen to our bodies and do what feels right in the moment.
Now, it is common to feel in a funk during this time which might make us more grumpy than usual. People around us (by this I mean fathers, husbands, boyfriends..) may start to dread this time or criticise us for being hormonal and moody. If things aren’t going as we would like in our lives this is the time when our intuition will be screaming at us that things aren’t right which can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and depression. It is true that we are more critical than usual during the second half of our cycle but this doesn’t have to be a bad thing. The reason is that we are much more insightful during this time as the excessive optimism rose tinted glasses attitude of ovulation has rapidly disintegrated and we are finally able to see clearly. If we can work on our communication skills with those around us, we can be really good at giving advice as we can see the big picture.
Our intuition is also strongest at this time, especially during bleeding days, and we have a strong sense of purpose and direction. If we channel this energy through spending quiet time in meditation or through reflective writing we can get some huge insights about our life and what we want. If we have projects ongoing this is a great time to take stock of where we are up to, what is going well and what needs to change. This is not the time to keep pushing if we are in the middle of something but a time to take time out and reflect. Although, if we are coming to end of a project the luteal phase is the perfect time to finish up and tie off loose ends as our heightened criticism means we can easily pay attention to detail.
I hope this offers another way to think about your cycle if you are struggling. Its not always easy but trying to see this hormonal rollercoaster as bringing different strengths and skills rather than focusing on the challenges can really help!
Recently I have been completely enthralled by the book Wild Power by Alexandra Pope and Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer. I love all things hormone related so I was really excited to read this one and I really think it is a must read for all women! I know when I first started my periods as a teenager I didn’t really think much of it, it was usually just a monthly surprise that made me moody and stopped me from doing sports. It wasn’t until almost 10 years later that I actually started to dive in and learn about the intricacies of the full female cycle.
One of the best things I started doing along the way was tracking my cycle which is referred to in the book as “Menstrual Cycle Awareness”. I started off pretty basic tracking my basal body temperature and my bleeding days so that I had a rough idea of when I was ovulating and how long my cycles were. In the beginning they were all over the place with annovulatory cycles and sometimes skipping periods altogether but it was so interesting to see my body start to regulate again. Now, 2 years later, cycle tracking has become an important part of my daily routine.
I use an app called Maya to record any symptoms such as bloating, cravings, insomnia as well as my mood. The app estimates when my next period will be, when I am most fertile and alerts me to any expected symptoms based on my historical data. It might seem a bit excessive but I have been so surprised at the patterns I have seen and actually it has been a really great way to become more present and tune into my body on a daily basis. There are loads of apps such as Clue and Flo that do a pretty similar thing. You can also use them for tracking your fertile window if you are trying to (or trying to avoid!) getting pregnant.
Now this book takes Menstrual Cycle Awareness to the next level. They describe the four phases of the cycle or the “inner seasons” which this video sums up pretty well. Most women, including myself until pretty recently, see the cycle as either bleeding or not bleeding. You might be aware of mood changes in the run up to your period. especially for those who struggle with PMS but when we start to pay close attention we can see subtle shifts in energy all throughout the cycle as our hormone levels change.
The four phases can be put into two main vibes. Phases 3 and 4, the follicular and ovulatory phases are when the womb lining building itself up ready for the release of an egg. This represents the masculine or yang energy phase when energy levels are higher and is the time when we tend to feel like being out there in the world and getting stuff done. Phases 1 and 2, the menstrual and pre-menstrual phases are when the womb waits for the arrival of the egg then releases the lining if you aren’t pregnant. This represents the feminine, yin energy and usually is the call to retreat and move more slowly in the world, allowing time for intuition and reflection.
Unfortunately today’s world doesn’t seem to appreciate this feminine energy. We always feel the need to be productive and in control and this lower energy is not welcome. But just becoming aware of these changes in my body and mind through menstrual cycle awareness made me start to wonder, what if I did allow myself to listen to my body? And what happens when I don’t? I recently I had a busy weekend that just happened to fall when my period was due. I had a lot of work to do then I had a couple of late nights with my boyfriend and friends and it completely wiped me out. I was exhausted all of the next week and I couldn’t understand why. It was only later when I looked back and I realised that I hadn’t allowed myself the rest and time out I needed on those days. How could I expect to run without recharging my batteries!
So since then I have started paying more attention to my cycle, my energy levels and my moods. I find it very hard to say no to things, even when I don’t feel like it but I know this is going to be key to getting my health back on track. I have started writing a moon journal, not every day but when I feel like it and honestly I feel like superwoman. I feel like I have a secret weapon that no one knows about and it is amazing. It is early days but I really feel like I am starting to understand my own rhythms better than ever and hopefully I can use it to start organising my life in a way that I can do all of the things I want to but without exhausting myself in the process.
Moon Life 